the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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