My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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