wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
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