oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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