Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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