So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize