we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
