Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize