Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize