I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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