This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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