you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
