No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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