So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize