The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
