I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
