part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
