butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
i think im in europe. pls send help
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
