The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I faked an abortion last night.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Randomize
