Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
