Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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