dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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