Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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