Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
