Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
