You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
