at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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