He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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