i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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