She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize