I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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