Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
