I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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