I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
