is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Couch. On fire.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
