My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
