Swine flu. Run for my life!
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
It was confusing and full of hummus
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
