i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
