wat bout pragnant strippers??
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
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