Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
