If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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