they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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