We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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