a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
