We won't sleep together?
Porn is love you can see.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
