is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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