Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
