My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
