She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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