she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
